Netflix dropped a series that blew my mind this week. A lot of the things shared in the series have helped me understand what happened to me, a little better. Critical: Between Life and Death, will help people understand me in general, a touch better.
He’s not orientated to the time of day it is, or what day it is, or where he is, and so those skills we’ve been doing since we were a child are quite difficult at the moment.
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When someone sustains a frontal love brain injury, we see lots of cognitive changes that affect social norms and our personalities.
Episode 5, 37:57
When I woke up, on the one important day, in the recovery specialised care hospital, I thought it was a dream. A vivid dream hallucinating that I’m in a hospital recovery ward. The only thing I completely remembered was driving to university at the start of the year. I had woken, on days before, mind you, and socialised with others.
It didn’t quite click for me, on day one, I was actually in hospital. The day flew past the save this in memory parts of my mind, so I can’t quite share what all happened. What stood out to me was waking early, in a room with 5 other beds, some occupied with patients sleeping, the morning after, as the nurse checked we were all alright.
I, roughly, remember calling her over quietly to ask if I’m actually in hospital. I don’t remember all of the details around that time, as my mind was still way below proper cognitive form, but I can share it gave me a new respect for our health care professionals here in South Africa.
The big moments I remember were learning to walk on my own, again, the lovely coffee shop or restaurant owned by the friendliest old lady I can’t remember more than her broad love, and my psychiatry oriented therapists. One whom knew me from high school, apologies if I bunch everyone into the wrong area. Note, my speech was troublesome until I wrote Accidental Distances, which I’m trying to work towards publishing right now. Writing over 108k words helped me put the right ideas in my head into the right direction, thankfully.
I’m only sharing this today, as a lot of people could understand more of what happened to me from it. My difficulties happened, and each episode, so far – up to 5, has touched on a few parts of my personal experiences from this incident. My recovery went well because I glued my adjusted mind to the idea I could bring it back to life, and with the new paths I built over several years, I’m doing decently, thankfully.
Yes, I see my mind as adjusted. I work on things more through vision of inanimate objects, which have no relevance to the issue, that trigger new memories I made using images. My left frontal lobe is slightly less harmed, and at least when I throw images at ideas, for no reason, and it helped me build new paths. I don’t need to look at physical things anymore, but walking around to look at random things will in a short time trigger the right memory for problem solving.
It’s tough, but I’ve learned to love it. I never know what I associate with the memory when I make a new memory, ever, but taking in the world around me as a whole, without even realising what I actually looked at, I remember, these days. I’m worried about it, mind you, only on the rare occasion it doesn’t bring any memory back, except it wakes me at odd hours of the morning (i.e. before normal sleep waking time) as I see things that trigger the memory in a lucid dream, or two.
I believe it’s important to understand, as seen in episode 5, it can be different, and difficult in different ways, for everyone who suffers this unfortunate circumstance.
To do this job, you have to have a very thick skin. And, you have to be really firm, but in a kind way.
Episode 5, 42:28
I thank all the medical professionals who helped me get back to my strongest capabilities. It’s a tough job, and I can only hope I wasn’t a troublemaker, back then in that mental state.
To finish off, it’s a perfect series to see, to understand how you should stay safe in life, as even the fair ground ride you’re going to for fun, might change it. No warning, mind you, have fun with everyone you love, every day. That’s it. It might be one unexpected incident that takes them away from you for a few days, months, years, or even forever, unfortunately.
Love everyone every day. Don’t continue fights, or arguments, do you want that to be the last memory you have with that person? Let’s be friends, life already gives us all enough foes.
